Teaching Your Children Modern Manners (Cathryn Harper)

My mother loved Emily Post. Most readers today don't know the name, but EP was the epitome of good manners, advising all who sought advice on social, business, home, family and special event matters. Going far beyond what greeting to recite and which fork to use, Ms. Post went on to form the Emily Post Institute, which continues to guide those in need of a little social grooming toward the right approach.

Not all of us want, or even need, to be well-versed in how to greet heads of state or a royal family member, but the world has become so casual that many forget, or have never learned, some of the most basic manners that set us apart as civilized as opposed to savage.

I took my girls to classes in basic niceties that also taught children how to dance, how to perform introductions, how to set a table, and how to politely refuse an invitation, and oh, I wish a few of my friends had done the same. As the saying goes, you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. Or say excuse me.

Still, there are some things that would play better if people minded their manners. In queues, at parties, behind the wheel, and just about anywhere where one's intentions might be misinterpreted, Emily Post's helpful hand would be appreciated.

Where did my generation learn manners? Mostly from parents, as well as from other people's parents, and also in school, church, boy scouts and girl scouts. Coaches, teachers, relatives and friends would all take us aside and whisper to us when we stepped outside the bounds of good behavior. And, most of us listened. Remove your hat when you enter a building, or when the National Anthem is played. Open doors for women and the elderly. Use 'please' and 'thank you.' Bring a small gift for your hostess. Little things, really, in the grand scheme, but they made life a little nicer.

Today, things are edgier, crisper, less formal. And people are in a hurry with little time for outdated formalities. People make careers today out of things that were outright rude just a few decades ago, like asking intrusive personal questions, intentionally embarrassing someone, or gossiping, staring and pointing. I mean, what would a reality show be without all of that?

It often seems that today, people just don't see the need. Or do they? Perhaps I am misjudging, and perhaps there are still many parents, teachers, and coaches out there, engaging children in doing the right thing. I took a peek online, and found many sites geared toward learning Western manners, offering training for those headed to America to study or work. Still more sites offered courses in international protocol and diplomacy. There were a few sites directed internally, by Americans, for Americans. As we move toward a more toward a global society, international manners, as well as local ones, might just help us become a little kinder toward strangers, and a little gentler on those we love, as well as an improved nation overall. Improving our own children's behavior is a great place to start.

Cathryn is a working mother of three. A self-professed health and fitness nut, Cathryn loves to research and write about health and wellness related topics. For more information please visit at http://www.cathrynharperpress.com/